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“Especially in the beginning of a relationship, when you’re getting to know someone, and there are so many different elements.You don’t want to just be defined by your allergies – but it can feel like that sometimes.” That feeling is one that Randall Koop, 53, has struggled with since being diagnosed with a severe alpha-gal (or red meat) allergy that is acquired through a tick’s bite.Whether it’s online or in real life, Carroll – who is allergic to peanuts and shellfish – encourages clients to embrace their allergies as part of their identity, rather than viewing them as baggage.“You want to show that you’re a whole person, and a food allergy is just a part of that.” Mary Fran Wiley, 32, is no stranger to online dating. ” But as soon as her date orders a beer, her thinking shifts to: “Shoot, you ordered a beer.TESSA Bantock was a college sophomore when she fell for a boy with dark hair and blue eyes.She met him at a party in 2012 and they immediately hit it off, talking about their shared love of music long into the night.Miller advises that these conversations should not be a one-time event.
Brennan offers a good example of casually introducing the food allergy subject in a way that gets it out there, without making it seem daunting.
Even on big websites such as OKCupid or e Harmony, Carroll notes that online dating can make it easier to put any food allergies out there by including them in the personal profile.
According to the Toronto-based allergy counselor, regardless of whether someone has food allergies or not, if the person is not willing to help keep you safe, then that’s the real deal-breaker.
He met his current girlfriend through friends and during their first date, he asked her to share a personal “fun fact,” knowing that she would then ask him the same question – and he had his food allergy answer ready.
“I like to bring it up as a conversation piece early on rather than just mentioning it, because then you can educate without overwhelming the person,” he says.
The 26-year-old notes that at parties or at bars, if he was flirting with a girl and she leaned in for a kiss, he had to turn away.